Trash God
Season 5, Episode 8
Dick Figures - Trash God (Ep 48)

Dick Figures - Trash God (Ep 48)

Air date March 27, 2014 (Download)
May 14, 2014 (Mondo)
May 29, 2014 (YouTube)
Episode run time 3:32
Episode guide
Das Vidiamond
Chick Figures

Trash God is the eighth episode of Dick Figures Season 5 and the 48th episode of Dick Figures.


While trying to rid their apartment of an ant infestation, Red and Blue are shrunk down to insect-size! The ants revere Red as their “Trash God” because of how dirty he is. Ant-hilarity ensues.



(In the apartment, Red eats pizza. The place is filled with ants and pizza boxes.)

Blue: Dude, have you seen my car keys? I can't find anything in this place it's a fucking mess!

Red: They're probably in one of those pizza boxes.

Blue: (groans) I told you to get rid of those a week ago! Now we have like a zillion ants!

(Red stomps on an ant.)

Red: Now it's a zillion and one! (floats)

Blue: I'm gonna go call the exterminator.

(Knock at the door, Blue opens it and it shows Raccoon,)

Raccoon: Hola! I wirr kirr your ants. I have brought the ANT-imizer! It's... an Atimizer for ants, get it?

Red: (to Blue with an annoyed look) We should call an exterminator for our Raccoon problem.

Raccoon: What?!

Blue: Hup! Uh, nothing, fire away.

(Raccoon fires the Antimizer at Red and Blue, who both suddenly disappear.)

Raccoon: Oops. That was de a Shrink-a ray! (slowly backs away) Back away. Srowrrryyyy. Sorry.

(Cut to Red and Blue.)

Blue: Wha-? Where are we?!

Red: Du-u-ude! We're TINYYYYYYY!

(Shows them shrunk down with ants walking around them.)

Blue: We got shrunk?!

(An ant approaches the two.)

Ant: Hey! What are you two bunkeads, doing on our turf?

Blue: Your turf?! This is our apartment, what are you doing here?!

Ant: We were drawn by the endless bounty of the all mighty pile!

(Cut to the pizza box pile With slow uprising heavenly music.)

Red: Ohh, my pizza boxes!

(Heavenly music plays)

Ant: Your... pizza boxes? (falls to his knees) The Trash God comeeeth! 

Other ants: Trash God? That must be Trash God.

(All of the ants fall to their knees.)

Ants: All hail Trash God!

Blue: (angry) No...fucking...way.

Red: (happy) No...fucking...way!

Ant 1: Trash God, you honor us with your presence. We thank you for your weeks of delicious garbage. Come. Let us bathe you in old beer and Pepperoni oils.

Red: (to Blue, laughing) Holy crap, this is my dream.

Ant 2: Oh! Take him to the holy crap!

Other ants: (picking up Red and carrying him) Take him to the holy crap! 

(They go to Blue's room)

Ant 1: Behold! The holy crap!

(A pile of feces is on the floor.)

Red: Ho ho, that one's a classic.

Blue: What?! Red, you pooped in my room again?!

Ant 1: Your... room?

Blue: (nervous) Uhhh... maybe?

Ant 1: You are the Blue Titan! You who vacuum our peoples and take our crumbs!

Ant 2: You swept off my family!

Blue: (still nervous) I have a girlfriend. Gotta keep my room clean. 

Ant 1: Seize the bringer of death! 

(The ants charge toward Blue and two of them grab him.)

Blue: Hey, don't seize me, you assholes!

Ant 1: Benevolent Trash God, what should we do with the bringer of death?

Red:(brief pause, then glares at Blue) Bring him DEATH!

Blue: What?! Red! This isn't funny, come on, man!

Ant 1: You will suffer, the worst death imaginable. (Holds up the shrink ray.) SHRINK RAAAYYYYY! 

(The other ants cheer.)

Blue: Oh, God, what a Monday!

Ant 1: We will make the Blue Titan, Blue, Ti-nyyyy(Shrinks Blue, who screams.)

Blue: Oh, my God!

(Ant 2 picks him up and gives him to Red.)

Ant 1: An offering to the red Trash God! 

Blue: No! No! Red, don't eat me!

Red: Sorry, dude. Shoulda let me eat that pizza.


(Red eats him. The ants cheer and Red laughs.)

Red: Whoo!

Ant 1: Oh, the world is finally at peace. All hail Trash God! 

Red: Feast upon the pile! 

Ants: To the pile!

(The ants and Red head towards the pizza pile.)

(Cut to inside Red's stomach, which is pitch-black. Blue opens his eyes.)

Blue: Oh, my God! I'm in Red's stomach, this is my nightmare! (Looks down to his right.) Oh, there's my keys.

(Episode Ends)

Running Gags

Episode Ending

Normal letter I's, the Dick Figures logo shakes, and the Episode Ending is dextended. Then a promo for Dick Figures Season 5. In the YouTube version, it instead showed a sneak peek for Chick Figures

Red Floating

Red was floating in the beginning after stepping on an ant.

Auto-Tune Usage



  • When Red stomped on one of the ants, he said there was a zillion and one left, but Blue earlier said there was only a zillion, this could likely be an error or shows that Red or Blue have bad counting.
  • This is the least viewed episode of the entire series, possibly due to the strongly negative response the episode received.
  • According to Zack Keller, Trash God was the last episode Ed and Zack had to make for Season 5, even though it's the eight episode of the season.


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